North Indians believe that the blessing of transgenders come true.
Yesterday I saw them near tollgate. One person was like a model and I was overawed. If ‘Wishing well’ had been nearby, I would have thrown a dime and wished!? Then she came towards me in a zigzag walk “tap” “tap”ed near my face twice and said “Give me 10 rupees Sir” in a salt paper voice. Luckily wishing well was not there. Otherwise next time when you cross that tollgate, you would have seen me tap, tapping. I gave her money like a 3G spectrum accused and talked to her politely as I always talk before spotting the hidden gold in the passenger. When I told her that I am the overall in charge of the International Airport, Chennai, She was overawed. She shared her problem and I poured my problem (Night Crawlers part I and II). She told me that I was the most important person and I couldn’t help remembering my Boss who always tells me the same till end of the shift. She mocked me to marry her. I assured him/her that I will be back if I am ever kicked out by my wife which may not be far away seeing the way I express here. When we departed with tearful eyes and heavy heart, she blessed me as
” Have a happy long life with WIVES and children”.
WIVES?!
I am confused now. Because did she actually bless me or curse me by wishing “WIVES”?
I can go on a ‘marrying spree’ and honour the belief of north Indians or I can act against her noble (!) wish by not marrying and break the myth of north Indians thereby causing havoc in their hearts. I am at the crucial stage of my life to go with or against millions of people!
Supposing that their wishes always come true…
Dragging the life with one wife or husband itself is a lifetime achievement for anyone. In this context, how can I live with multiple wives happily that too a long life or will the life look to be long if I marry exponentially? Wife is the centre/epicentre of any house as she always stands on her husband, the brick, all the time.
Is there any guidance book from Rapidex like “How to live happily with multiplying wives”? Or Can any experienced man “cast the first stone?”
Is there a “Pariharam” i.e remedy for averting this impending disaster ?
If it’s true?
Then how many does the plural term of “wives” actually denote? Two or more? Will I be blessed with 350 wives like Dasaratha or Sixteen thousand wives like Krishna? With 16,500 wives I will be like “Owners Pride, Neighbour’s Envy”.
Shall I give ad like “Wives needed. Colour, height, weight no bar. Married, Divorcee, single, double no problem. Indian, African, Martian no issues. Bridegroom works in the International airport for the last 6 months. At what time he works and at what time he sleeps is not yet clear. Earns handful and talks mouthful.
Should I have to lease a building like Airport for residence or live under a shamiana? Should I pay house tax or corporation tax?
16,500 ladies under one roof. Won’t rest of the Tamil Nadu go deaf? Will anyone ever invite me “with family” to their function? There won’t be any family photo in my life only family movie.
In the brighter side, I can have my own cricket teams, Wife Wars and family marathon with my offspring. My family will become the new taluk under Tamil Nadu State and I will be the independent MLA as well and fight for “We Two, Ours Nil” Plan like every politician does. I will take one cylinder per wife and surrender the remaining wives I mean cylinders. Can you find six differences between these two?
I thought for long, convinced myself and took the bold step to marry for the sake of helping 16,500 girls. Suddenly the thought of 16500 MOTHERS IN LAW doomed on me.
Now I have sworn to live with my One and Only Wife Full Stop