🎺My musical journey…🎼🎼🎼
After a lot of research, I booked my bus ticket in KPN Bus Service from Salem to Chennai last week. Semi Sleeper, AC bus, Volvo comfort, window seat and all those stuff. I cheerfully boarded the bus and sank into the bucket seat. My neighbour was a thin fellow which meant armrest was mine. It was dusk and I loved the music and scenery. I might have dozed a bit, suddenly when a terrifying sound woke me up. It was like the bus had met with an accident or had just missed one. But everything remained calm for a moment. Then again that roaring sound made me to jump from the seat. To my disgust, I saw my neighbour snoring like a stranded whale. He was a thin fellow with small nose but made that trumpeting sound. Till then I had only seen elephants make that sound with long noses. I was aghast and didn’t know how to face that calamity. It was like opening a rusted drawer and shutting it. To my utter dismay, everyone else was sitting as if nothing had happened. Again my nemesis drew air like submarine and horned like a ship. Both sounds were different. I sincerely wanted to hit his face with a shovel.
Instead I woke him up and told him “You are snoring very loud”. That guy grinned at me and told “Sorry. My wife also tells this.” I asked him, “When did you marry?”. He told “Before a month”. I thought that soon She would run away or ask for divorce. Then I asked him “How is she managing?”. He replied “She sleeps in the other room”. Honestly if I were her, I would have slept on the road. I have heard people snore. By God, this one was from another level. It’s like scratching the wall with nails or dragging the steel cupboard on the concrete floor.
Again we tried to sleep. Actually, I tried and he slept. After 5 minutes, again he blazed the ship siren. I sat and watched his twitching mouth. It quivered and shuddered. It followed a pattern. He roared three times but changed the sound on the fourth. Then the symphony repeated. I watched all the calm passengers wondering whether I had booked ticket in “deaf and dumb” bus. No one seemed to care. Just then another person from the front seat made a squeaking sound and started to snore in a different pitch. I understood that my sleep had become a myth and had to survive that night. Stuffing cotton in my ear or wearing turbon or wearing helmet or mummifying my head and the like. I bumped on my seat partner a bit hard voluntarily. Snoring stopped for a while. Again he started to snore with vengeance. I jabbed him a bit. He stopped and re-started.
I opened google to see “how to survive a snoring neighbour”. It showed “how to survive a snoring husband”. I saw my husband (!) for a second. Whatever….!(i) Roll him over – Actually I wanted to roll him off the bus.(ii) Use nasal strips – I wanted to use strangling rope. (iii) Use big pillow under his head – I would use a bigger pillow over his face and hold it tight till snoring stopped.(iv) Give him a hot bath, Be understanding, change bed, change pillow blah blah… Changing husband would have been the best option.
By that time two more passengers had joined the orchestra, all in different pitches. A lady was also growling (33% you see). Each made a different sound. When one drew, another howled. It was like sleeping in the zoo amidst all animals. A fat man in the nearby seat also started to SNORE. He drew air heartily and tremored while exhaling. Further sounds had started to come from all corners. One was landing and taking off his flight. Another had switched on the wet grinder. One was hooting and hissing. All will fall silent when the bus shook and return after a brief interval.
I went to the driver and asked if i can drive the bus or be a helper to check tyre pressure and clean the windshields. Pitying me, the driver accommodated me with his helper. Inside the bus, all animals that had escaped the Jurassic park were trying to eat one another. A bit of calmness slowly returned to me and I closed my eyes. Then my helper started his engine…